My buddy Jay tagged me yesterday. I didn’t even know there was a game of tag going on, so I wasn’t exactly doing my best dodging and weaving. Nevertheless, I am now “it” and am happy to reveal five random tidbits about myself that might just help you understand me better. Let’s see…
1. I lost my father to a shotgun suicide when I was four years old.
2. I lost my virginity to a girl named Denise when I was fifteen years old.
3. Probably the first legitimate “job” I had was when I was in the 9th grade. I bred my rats and sold the babies to a local pet store. It was enjoyable and rewarding, but my rat-breeding career came to an abrupt halt when I learned that pet stores only sell baby rats from uncertified sources for one purpose: snake food.
4. My parents’ house burned to the ground in the summer of 1987 and we lost pretty much everything we owned. I was the only one home when it happened and as this was before my folks had cell phones, I could not get hold of them. Without support or backup of any kind, I had to deal with a fire investigator who did his best to get me to confess to a fire I didn’t set just so he could wrap things up quickly. I also gave a statement to TV crews and confronted morbid neighbors who insisted on video-taping the destruction of my home. I did a lot of growing up that day.
5. I know what it’s like to jump out of a perfectly good airplane at 28,000 feet and achieve terminal velocity.
So there you go. I tried to mix it up a bit so as not to make my life seem any more harsh or any more rosy than it really is.
I totally get why Jay tagged his people privately, but I will just make it clear that anyone I tag who doesn’t want to participate does not have to. I won’t be offended in the slightest.
There are so many people I want to know stuff about, but I can only pick five. I’m tagging, in no particular order: