So McAfee is here today giving people a chance to win cash and prizes by making idiots of themselves inside this money-blowing chamber. The fake McAfee Money is exchanged for actual US lucre and the colored pieces of paper designate nifty prizes.
This is a lot harder than it looks, kids. First of all, there are rules. You can’t put the money in your pockets and you can’t hold your shirt open to catch it. You have to grab it out of the air and hold onto it. Secondly, you have to wear the Elton John specs, which seriously mess with your vision (as well as your dignity).
You get to keep whatever you grab in twenty seconds.
So here’s the thing. Imagine you have your hands full of, say, six bills each. You know the prizes are worth way more than the money in your hands. Do you keep the wads of cash you have or do you grab again, releasing the money in that hand in the hopes of snagging one of the colored slips that might get you a laptop or something fabulous like that? Decisions, decisions.
Interestingly, standing in a money tornado causes you to make very bad choices.
As you might expect, I have some pointers for those of you who one day find yourself inside an over-sized vacuum cleaner grabbing at gusts of greenbacks:
1. The Safe Hand Method
Grab with both hands until one of your hands seems chock full of bills. This hand we’ll call your “safe hand.” Once you’ve decided on a safe hand, grab with the other hand only for the rest of your time, placing whatever you get into the safe hand. This way, once you have something, you don’t lose it again because the safe hand isn’t opening up to grab stuff. You can stick more and more bills into that hand without losing any as long as you’re careful.
2. No Discrimination
Don’t focus on any one bill. If you spend time trying to grab a specific slip, you’ll end up with nothing. It’s totally a random-grab sort of thing. The bills are simply moving way too fast to be singled out.
3. Get Your Freak On
A lot of money will stick to your crotch*. In fact, in most cases, once the wind is turned off, there will be more money falling from your crotch than you have in your hands. One strategy might be to just keep plucking bills from that region for the entire twenty seconds (which is totally within the rules). It’s just a matter of whether or not you mind a crowd of people with digital cameras watching you stand in a display case grabbing your privates over and over.
*What a wonderful sentence, huh?